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Personal thinking

Toxic people

There are people who seem that wherever they go they cause unhappiness in others. Those people can be one of your family member, your friends, your boss or your co-worker. Unfortunatly, I have been around those people far long enought that it drives me crazy sometimes and I have to protect myself from being control, abused or hurt. I get why some people I meet are on their defensive side a lot, they don’t want to get hurt.

People who show their vulnerability can be easily manipulated, put down and abused by people who see it as a weakness. But there is absolutely nothing wrong  with being vulnerable but when someone is abusing you, you have to show strenght of character. Knowing when to say stop when someone is controlling you, abusing you or hurting you.

What if it’s someone you trust like your family member, it can be a bit difficult. I have family members that try to control,abuse and even hurt me and it got worst at some point in my life especially at the time when they loss their job. I eventually stand up and I didn’t take the crap they gave me. At the moment, I still see them but it has gotten better. Did they change? No, they decide to bring it somewhere else. Whenever I see the people my family members are working with, they all look very unhappy. Funny that it also happens in other places where they used to work.

How do we get away from toxic people?

First of all, never ever take it on someone else. You don’t want to be another toxic person roaming the earth but to detach the negativities state they put you in from your everyday life with others.

Second, do the things you enjoy doing and that provide great joy to you.

Third, if you have the chance to talk them about it then do it but if it doesn’t work like in my case, you just try not to hang out with them as much as possible. There are possibilities that you have to get them out of your life.

There are, however, situations where you can’t get out of it that easily. I encounter someone who decide to partner with a toxic person to invest in a business. The toxic person sweet talks you into partnering with them, telling how great of a person he/she is and how much experience he/she has in the business. I knew that it wouldn’t work out… I just knew it. They don’t know the person as well as I do. I know the toxic person personally but I couldn’t say anything because I’m just a kid who doesn’t know anything. Well, my instinct was right and that person got screwed by the toxic person. It just hard for me to see them unhappy. That person has a family to feed and back then, he has a good job with decent paid, a nice house and time off.

What to do in this situation? That person gave up everything; money, job, house and time. Now, he’s working with the toxic person where he ends up working everyday for months without getting a decent pay, get put down a lot and get control around a lot.

Sometimes, I wonder how much a person actions can do so much harm to others. The toxic person, clearly, doesn’t take into considerations anything about the other person state. She/he only cares about themselves.

Be careful of toxic people!

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Discussion

2 thoughts on “Toxic people

  1. hi christina, i like what you said about toxic people. i found my dad to be a toxic person. he always complained. i realized that i have become toxic too, in the sense that i complained and felt depressed many times. so what did i do? i moved out to my mom’s! it helped me a lot to become a better person. i wouldnt say that i’m a happy person everyday, but i am not toxic. I guess i am neutral 🙂

    Posted by leon | January 18, 2011, 11:02 PM

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