After my backpacking trip, I realized that doing things alone isn’t so bad after all. It gives me a sense of freedom and the ability to choose what I really want to do without worrying what other people think of me. I used to care a lot how people perceive me if I’m alone 90% of the time but now, it seems natural to me. I can’t say I’m 100% confident in doing things alone but I’m about to reach that percentage soon.
Why people are afraid of being alone? Why was I? I used to be scared of dealing with myself. The scariest person in the world it seems, is my own self; I didn’t want to deal with the person that I am and I prefer to concentrate on other flaws instead of my own. I decide this summer to get to know Christina more, the real her. It wasn’t pretty and I was disappointed in her. Eventually, I learn to forgive her and I embrace her with open arm. I told her that I accept the way she is and we can build the future together… The way we both want. From then on, Christina and I have emerged into one. Together, we are stronger than being two separate people. In a way, I made myself into a group which kind of make me laugh a little.
It sounds really cheesy, I do admit… But it’s the truth. Being satisfied being alone does not mean I am not looking for a relationship, I hope to find someone someday but I have my life to take care of.